My attempts at important conversations

Originally I posted this 1/30/17. 


I plan important conversations. My tone of voice, my body language, my words and sentenced are rehearsed. I plan for three reactions from the other person good, bad, or neutral. What I don't plan for is things like this

Me in my head: ok i really want to talk to alien x about where he parked his spaceship. I will be respectful and kind and say "alien x, I known you chose to park here and it's hard to move a spaceship but I can't get to work because my parking spot is blocked" I will smile and not use an accusatory tone, if he says no i will insist.
Me: hey alien x nice weather huh?
Alien x: uhm yeah, hey I'm kind of busy right now, can we talk later?
Me: oh uhm no problem I just wanted to ask you a question
Alien x: turns and waits for me to talk
Me mumbling: can uhm I mean uhm cars uhm spaceships uhm
Alien x: look I really got get back to what I was doing, I'm sorry
Me: angry with myself taking it out on alien x : just move your damn spaceship so I can get to work dude!

Or

Me in my head: I'm going to tell my best friend, who I know will do anything for me, about this thing I need and only she can help me with it because I trust her more then anyone else. I will bring up the subject and if she responds in a positive way I will tell her that it is something I need and ask her to help me. If she responds negatively to the subject I wil find out why she feels that way and then drop the subject. If she doesn't have an opinion on the subject i will talk more about it before asking for help.
Me: hey friend can we talk for a minute? Its important
Friend: yeah sure what's up?
Me: ...
Friend: are you ok?
Me: uhm...yeah...so uhm...
Friend: waits patiently
Me: right...so you know that...
Person interrupts: hey friend can I get your help over here for a minute?
Friend: I'm in the middle of something hold on
Me: nah you go, it can wait
Friend: go ahead and tell me
Me lying: I don't remember what i was going to say
Friend: hesitantly walks away

Me under my breath: damnit I almost actually got the words out this time