just a note.

Just a reminder. Autistic people  arent afraid of the noises and lights and extra stimuli or being under stimulated. It literally HURTS us.  If you are trying to get your kid to get used to all the extra stimulation by forcing them into situations and then getting angry with them for having a meltdown or stimming. Just remind yourself that you are literally hurting them and then getting angry with them for not being able to deal with it.

Stimming

I have tried to put a lot of thought into this. Parts of it I took from a facebook post that I made.

Sometimes I may stim. It may be weird or embarrassing but it isnf about you. "Oh she's stimming this is embarrassing to me" are you really my friend if it embarrasses you?

Stimming is important. Its self regulation and self stimulation. Although I may not be able to tell you WHY I'm stimming it's important.

Vocalizing: I may make weird noises, mimic new words, repeat words over and over, sing, or hum. If I need to vocalize and I don't it hurts. My throat will begin to hurt and my ears will begin to hurt. Sometimes i can't control my vocalizing, this means it happens whether I want it to or not.

Physical movements: Shaking my legs up and down non stop this one I have no control over, it just happens. 

Counting on my fingers when there's nothing to count, I tap my fingers against each other. I usually do this when I'm trying to ward of a panic attack or when I'm overstimulated. 

Rocking is something I do when I'm overstimulated or im thinking too much. I dont know why it helps but it does.

Making funny faces like wiggling my eyebrows, doing weird things with my lips, or wiggling my nose. I do this because my face feels weird if I don't make faces it will start to hurt.(I dont know how to explain that my face feels weird)  

Occasionally I flap my arms. It relieves the tension in my arms as well as helps me regulate my senses. I do it yo show joy or occasionally when I'm angry or anxious. 

Drumming my fingers or dancing my fingers. Usually when I love the music, or I want to dance but I suck at dancing.

I Twirl my hair and rub my ears vecause it's comforting.

Problematic stims for me: picking my lips, chewing my fingers and nails, sucking my thumb, and scratching my head until its sore. These things usually occur when I'm stressed, overstimulated, understimulated, or upset.  They have always been difficult to stop. Having a leather bracelet with scented oils to smell helps sometimes.

If I don't appear to be distressed leat me stim.

 If I DO appear to be in distress my face may show it. I may begin to look around nervously. Look like I'm upset or anxious, about to cry or hyperventilating. If this is the case guide me away from the environment I'm in. Take me outside or somewhere quiet and either hold me tight (if I know you well) or wrap me in a blanket or jacket. 

This may look different for other autistic people. They may have different stims. Ask them what they need. Get to know what they need before you hang out with them. If they don't know what they need it may be because no one has cared before.

A little about me

This was supposed to be posted first. Oops. It's a rewrite of my intro.

Hi I'm Bella. I am 34 years old and I have a 14 year old boy I call monkey (in my old blog I called him bug lol), I have a 10 year old girl I call Rocky and a 1 year old boy I call Loki.

I don't know what I will write exactly, just its all about my life. Whatever things in this brain of mine that I want to share. A lot has changed since My old blog.

I have actual diagnoses now. Autism, learning disorders, ADHD, PTSD, OCD,depression, fibromyalgia, spondylitis,  GERD and anxieties.

I have learned so much about myself and i have joined a community of friends who accept me for who i am. 

I am learning how to accept myself for who i am, learn from my experiences, and learn self control and patience (i will get there eventually...i hope...this is a long slow process) 

I believe that i am socially awkward, though depending on which of my friends you ask they will either agree fully and tell me to embrace it, agree and tell you its aggravating, or completely disagree and say im fine and they dont know what im talking about lol.

About me: Autism - the sense of touch. (Cross Posted)

I posted his 1/29/17.

The sense of touch.
This is a complex one.
I can be over responsive and under responsive or craving stimuli I don’t seem to have an in between place.

Will start with the over responsive reactions to touch. You already know how over responsive I am to the other four senses, rarely under responsive with those ones. But touch is different.

Clothes.
Tags in clothes are in and of themselves some sort of torture device, I just know it.
Socks, How can people handle having their socks on sideways or upside down? Doesn’t the seam rub against your skin and hurt like hell? I have learned to check my socks before I put them on, strings and little pill balls of lint…it feels like I have rocks in my socks or something. I wear socks out of necessity, either to hide my feet in public, or to keep my feet and shoes from smelling horrible when I wear shoes…otherwise no socks! They make my feet feel so confined.
Jeans, real jeans not jeggings or spandexy jeans, but like the stiff wranglers and such….they feel like sandpaper, another clothing I am certain was made to torture me : (.
Bras, unfortunately with enormo boobs you gotta wear bras or your boobs will slap you in the face. But no matter how pretty underwire bras make my boobs look I refuse to wear underwire bras. And the rest of the bras….if its necessary for my boobs to look nice I will wear a real bra but I don’t know how people do it. I prefer my super awesome ultra hold sports bra lol, its silky and doesn’t pinch or poke me.
Gloves with fingers make my fingers feel confined…I’m ok with fingerless gloves.
Shirts…what can I say about shirts….my fave fabrics or cotton and anything soft or silky…pretty much anything else feels like sandpaper.

Being touched.
This one might be partially a PTSD thing…but if I don’t see you or feel your presence and you suddenly touch me, tap me on the shoulder, pat my back, wrap your arms around me, stand super creepy close behind me. I will get scared, I may or may not try to knock you out. Please do yourself a favor and like…I dunno, make some sort of noise to indicate that you are there.
Tickling. Ok tickles can be fun…I will admit that…but why do people feel the need to dig their fingers into me? Lighten up….literally…I’m sure quite a few people who aren’t autistic would appreciate this too!
Pinching and poking.
Pinching my arm, leg, side , or fat rolls feels like the mix between a punch and a bee sting….not good, not fun…just…don’t. I might try to push, slap, bite, or kick you for it.
Poking…..don’t poke me….ever…not even lightly…it feels like you just punched me and again I might try to push, slap, bite, or kick you for it.

Under responsive reactions to touch.

Clothes.
If you see me wearing a tight tank top or shirt and tight leggings under some clothes that look loose and comfy its possibly I really needed to feel the compression that day. I don’t wear clothes that were actually made as compression clothes because they can be expensive so I find tight clothes to wear under things. I like my fingerless gloves for the same reason I like the feeling of the gloves around my arms and fingers. I don’t know why I don’t like socks…it’s like my feet live in a parallel universe or something. My feet are all like “oh the rest of you want to feel something? Not me, I wanna be different! Mwahahaha !” my fingertips also apparently live in this parallel universe with my feet because they don’t like to be covered either.

Jewelry.
I love jewelry. I love sparkly shiny, fun, colorful, and bright things. But I can’t wear them for very long. Necklaces start to feel like they are rubbing my skin raw (they really are not, and I am not having an allergic reaction in this case) you might see me wearing a ton of really cute jewelry one moment and then no jewelry at all the next.

Pain.
This is a very tricky one. I am not sure if I am immune to regular everyday aches and pains because I have had the pains for so long that I no longer recognize it.
How long would it take your hand from a hot stovetop? Half a second? Less then half a second? It doesn’t register to me for longer then a second. Long enough to give myself a deep burn. I have scars on my stomach from leaning against the oven door while the oven is on and not even realizing I burnt myself on the oven door. Apparently I’m also unaware of my surroundings, my own body a lot lol.